My friend *Chioma joined my church 2 years ago. As the bond between us grew, she developed a habit of giving me her life’s updates.

One Sunday, during one of the episodes of “Chioma Weekly”, she tells me she met someone, and she had declared him The One.

I was excited for her, and quickly started throwing in the questions:

“What does he do?”

“Is he a Christian?”

“What church does he attend?”

His name was Obinna. He was 29 years old, worked in a multinational, and was a Bible quoting and spirit-filled brother.

Later that week, Obinna called me and introduced himself, after which I invited both of them for lunch at my place the following Sunday.

Sunday lunch was great. My husband and I quizzed Obinna, and we noticed he had a great relationship with God and also had values which he lived by. A few months after, Obinna proposed. They had a beautiful wedding and went to Dubai on honeymoon.

When I called Chioma after her honeymoon, I was expecting to hear excitement in her voice, but the coldness I received could keep food fresh in a freezer for days.

I persuaded her to talk, and then she dropped it: “Tolu, Obinna is impotent!”

Me: Impotent, bawo? Impotent, how?

Chioma: The thing is not working.

Me: I don’t understand

Chioma: Me sef I don’t know how to explain it.

As she did her best to explain, my heart went out to her. I asked her if Obinna knew about his condition before they walked down the aisle, and she answered in the affirmative.

Obinna had deceived her.

I remembered when Chioma mentioned to me that Obinna had never made sexual advances towards her during their courtship period and her Aunt had advised her to test drive. She wouldn’t do it because it was against scriptures. I told her then that Obinna was just a child of God that wanted things done according to God’s will.

After hearing her honeymoon ordeal, Chioma’s dilemma had me thinking. These things happen every time; we hear of a couple getting married and when it’s time to drive engine to lala land, no movement, no sound, no action, nothing.

Are we becoming too spiritual that we forget to ask the salient questions? Or is sex not from God? So why are we discussing everything in courtship but not one of the most important things?


*Not real name.