Omo Rere

It’s so great to be back! I apologise for the long break. To make up for it, I have two posts for you today. Enjoy!


When my children do something good, I call them “omo rere”, which is Yoruba for “proper child”. You see, with my kids eating is a challenge. You practically have to beg, dance and make promises just to get them to eat something before going to school.

On this fateful day, my last daughter, without any dancing or promises from me, finished her food and showed me her plate, “Mummy see, I finished my food.”

I couldn’t believe my eyes. I started dancing, singing and praising her, “Omo rere,  omo rere, omo rere…” Her older sister was so unhappy about this that she came up to me with an accusing look and said, “Mummy, you!” I asked her what I had done wrong and she said, “Mummy, after everything I have done for you, you did not even call me omo rere.”

I wondered what my five-year-old could possibly have done for me, so I asked her.

“What have you done for me?”

She said she:

  1. Had her bath
  2. Brushed her teeth
  3. Did her homework
  4. Ate some of her food
  5. Made her bed.

After all these she did for me, I did not call her omo rere, she complained. I just had to clarify things for her right there and then. I explained to her that all those things she listed, she did for herself and not for me.

“If you don’t eat before going to school, you will be the one hungry before lunch time. If you don’t have your bath, you will smell and people will run away from you; you will have no friends. If you don’t do your homework you’re the one who will be punished in school. If you don’t make your bed, you’ll sleep in an untidy bed. So my dear, you are not doing me any favours. It’s because I love you and don’t want anything bad to happen to you, that’s why I encourage you to do these things you just listed.”

It’s the same in our relationship with God. When God commands us to do something, or to obey His commandments, it’s not for His benefit but for our own benefit. God knows the principles upon which He founded the earth. Those principles are based on who He is so when He tells us to keep His commandments which are based on those principles, it is for our own good. We are the ones who will be blessed. (Job 35:6)

If we sin, what do we accomplish against Him? However, because God is love, he doesn’t want anyone He created to suffer. That’s why He tells us in love to keep His commandments. That’s why He gave us His Son Jesus Christ to atone for our sins; it was out of love for us, not because He needs anything from us.

There is a Yoruba proverb that says, “Omo yi ma pa mi, ma pa mi, ife lo wa be.” When a mother is asking a child not to “kill her”, that is, do something that will hurt her, she is talking out of love. It will get to a stage where the mother will say, “Ma pa ara e!” meaning “Don’t hurt yourself!”


5 Steps to Get Your Prayers Answered


Do you want to know how to move from unanswered prayers to answered prayers? You must understand these basic steps:

  1. Pray: People often say they are praying, and they may not be. They may just be wishing and desiring. The way to get answers to prayer is to actually pray. Ask God and you shall receive. Dedicate time multiple times in a day to make your requests known to God.
  2. Diligence: To be diligent is to keep at it; that is, to keep praying until you get an answer. Pray today, pray tomorrow, pray every day. (Luke 18:1)
  3. Fasting: This brings about spiritual strength. There are certain things you can only get through fasting. (Matt 17:21, Mark 9:29)
  4. Submission to God: You must submit to God in everything. This means, do everything God wants you to do, obey His word, and love Him.
  5. Worship and Praise: This is one thing that opens the heavens. This gets the attention of God. God inhabits the praises of His people.


Why Pray?

About 3 weeks to my wedding, my younger brother came to Nigeria from the UK where he was studying, to attend the wedding. When he came, he reunited with some of his friends who were studying in Nigeria and other countries. They wanted him to throw a party celebrating his return.

Now, my older brother and I were eavesdropping on their conversation and we both decided not to give him a dime for the party because we felt it was a meaningless party – to us. My younger brother at that time did not have any money as he was a student who wasn’t working. However, he did not have the nerve to tell his friends.

So every morning, my younger brother would come to me and say “Sis, I believe you. I need this money” and he would explain the reasons why I should give him money for the meaningless party. Day after day, he would tell me I was the best sister in the world, that I was very dependable and reliable.

That was how I ended up giving my brother money for a meaningless party.

Jesus gave the same example in Luke 18, when we keep praying and asking God for the same thing, trust me He will give you. For instance, parents know that when children keep asking for a particular thing, at times you give it to them just to get them off your back.

So please, keep praying.



Next week: Why Diligence?

My Love, My Pain


Meeting Ijeoma was the best thing that had ever happened to Chike. Loving her brought him so much happiness for some reason he couldn’t explain. Her beauty and tenderness captivated his heart, and he knew he would definitely marry her.

They were from neighbouring villages in the same state, and Chike did not think his family would have any problem with Ijeoma. He introduced Ijeoma to his mother, and his mother adored her immediately.

Chike was a businessman who sold electronics at Gudu market in Abuja, where he had two shops. His business was doing very well and at the time he met Ijeoma, he had 6 boys under him, and he was building his house somewhere in town. Ijeoma was rounding up her HND and about to go for NYSC.

Chike informed his parents of his intention to marry Ij, but they asked him to hold on so they could make some findings about her.

One Tuesday morning, his mother came visiting. She told him in clear terms that he could not marry Ij, the love of his life. She said their findings revealed that Ij carried bad luck; anybody she married would never make progress in life, and there was also a high tendency of this bad luck affecting Ijeoma’s children.

Chike could not understand what his mother was saying. This was the first time he would have a disagreement with his mother. His mind was made up to marry Ijeoma.  Chike’s sisters paid Ijeoma a visit and asked her to leave their brother alone, but their efforts proved abortive.

Chike went ahead with the wedding and turned his back on his family.

Three years into the marriage, Chike’s fortunes had taken a turn for the worse, seemingly proving his family right.

He had lost everything he’d worked for over the years. He could not pay his house rent, had sold his 3 cars and his uncompleted building, yet his business was doing so badly that he had become heavily indebted. Chike had become a subject of gossip in the market; everyone was talking about how bad things had become for him.

Ikenna, Chike’s friend and colleague in the market, took him to a pastor, and the pastor told him exactly the same thing his mother and family members had told him; his wife Ijeoma belonged to a water spirit, and there was no way he would make progress with her in his house. The pastor also told Chike that their two daughters had the same spirit. Even giving money to Ijeoma or the children would always work against him.

Based on this, Chike decided to take his wife for deliverance. However, after going for more than 10 deliverance sessions at different churches, their situation remained the same.

Frustrated, Chike took another decision to separate from his wife and children. He sent them to his wife’s parents’ home.

To his greatest surprise, things turned around for him immediately. The association of traders to which he belonged at Gudu market contributed 2 million naira for him to invest in Chike’s business. According to them, they knew he was not a lazy man- he was just going through tough times and needed help.

Right now, Chike is confused. He is doing so well now that things have improved for him, but his heart still goes out to Ijeoma and his children. How can he be enjoying a comfortable life while they suffer? The thought breaks his heart. Is it not wickedness, he wonders.

What should Chike do?

Go and bring them back, and risk his life and business crashing again?

Marry another wife and start a new family?

Will God be angry with him for abandoning his wife and children?

“Poverty is not a good thing,” Chike says. “I don’t want to experience it again.” Yet his heart aches for his love, and their kids.

If you know any other way out, please advise Chike.

My Mum or My Dad?


Eighteen-year-old Rekia came home from school one Saturday morning to spend the weekend with her parents. She ate and chatted a little with her mother before heading to her room. Just as she entered her room, she heard the gate of the compound opening and suddenly her mother burst into her room and knelt down.

“Rekia your Dad is around, please say that the man in the house is your boyfriend and he came to ask for your hand in marriage, please.”

Rekia was confused; she did not understand what her mother was saying. “Which man?”

“Please just say he came to ask for your hand in marriage,” her mother begged, clasping her hands together.

Rekia’s father is married to three women: one in Kaduna, the other in Zaria, and Rekia’s mother in Abuja. Not long ago, rumours reached Rekia’s father that whenever he travels, Rekia’s mother brings a man home. So that fateful Saturday, he decided to come home unannounced in order to catch her red-handed, and he came with his two brothers.

When Rekia’s father entered the house, he met a man seated in the living room who looked to be in his 50s.

“Who is this man and what is he doing in my house?”

“He came to ask for Rekia’s hand in marriage,” Rekia’s mother answered.

Rekia’s father called her out and asked her if she knew the man, and if he came to ask for her hand in marriage.

“Yes, baba,” Rekia lied.

When her father asked why he came so early in the morning, Rekia said he was coming from a long distance and had to leave Abuja early. In fact, since he had been told Rekia’s father was not around, he was on his way out.

Rekia’s father looked at her with disappointment and betrayal in his eyes. He asked again if Rekia knew the man and if indeed he had come to ask for her hand in marriage, and again Rekia affirmed her mother’s story.

At this, her father said he granted his consent and that the wedding should hold in 3 weeks.

Rekia does not approve of her mother’ actions, and she knew nothing about her mother’s adultery until that Saturday. She took the swift decision to cover her mother because theirs is a polygamous family and the shame would be too much if her father divorced her mother. She and her younger brother would have to go and live with their stepmothers, and they would suffer.

Rekia’s father on the other hand feels betrayed by Rekia. He cannot believe his own child would do that to him. Her uncles are begging her to tell the truth. Rekia had not expected her father to come up with the decision for her to marry the man. The father she knows would never give any of his daughters in marriage to an old man.

Now, Rekia’s mother is begging her to stick to the story and not expose her.

Please advise Rekia.

The Betrayal


Morenikeji is a 42-year-old woman from a wealthy family who got married to Dotun 12 years ago. Unfortunately, their marriage did not produce children. Morenikeji has a very good job, but Dotun has not worked since they got married.

Eight years ago, Morenikeji decided to buy land, and she informed Dotun about it. Dotun suggested that they should walk in faith and buy the land in the names of their children yet unborn. Morenikeji agreed, bought the land, and built a beautiful house on it. All other property purchased after this time were also in the names of their unborn children, by faith.

Two weeks ago, Dotun died in an accident. To Morenikeji’s shock, a woman showed up with two children, the first about 9yrs old. Both children bear the names Dotun gave her to buy all their landed property in.

Dotun’s family has given her an ultimatum to move out of her home.

Please what should Morenikeji do?

The Believer’s Sexuality 2: Should Christian Couples Exchange Nudes?


Tomi has learnt obedience by the things she has suffered. She has learnt not to go through people’s pictures on their phones; you may be very surprised by the kinds of pictures on their phones.

Ovie, a brother in Tomi’s church who is happily married to Sandra, wanted to show Tomi something interesting he saw on Instagram so he gave Tomi his phone with the Instagram picture open. Tomi, a naturally curious person, decided to go through his personal pictures. After all he was a brother in church, and happily married, so what could there possibly be on his holy phone?

As she scrolled through Brother Ovie’s phone, she was shocked to find that it was filled with holy porn: naked pictures of Brother Ovie and his wife, and even a video of both of them. Tomi quickly handed the phone over to him, but she could not rest her mind. She had to talk to him about it.

“Brother Ovie, I’m sorry I went through your phone, but I saw some things on it that emm… emm…” she stammered. “I saw naked pictures of both you and your wife, and a sex tape of both of you. I’m sorry but, as a Christian, can we make sex tapes and have porn pictures on our phone as long as we are married to the person? Or is any sexual behaviour allowed as long as it is within the bounds of marriage?”

Brother Ovie responded by saying she should not have gone through his phone, but that yes, all sexual acts are acceptable as long as it’s within the bounds of marriage. He went on to say that he even used handcuffs and sex instruction tapes with his wife, and they send nude pictures of themselves to each other; they are married and it is his duty to satisfy his wife anyhow they want it. As long as it’s within the bounds of their marriage, it’s acceptable.

Tomi is still confused in her mind. To her, those actions are not pure.

  1. So is every sexual behaviour within the bounds of marriage of God?
  2. If no, what are the Bible-based boundaries?


Please comment.

Merry Christmas & Happy New Year!


Monkey Communication

It was resumption time at the Nigerian Law School, Abuja, and registration was ongoing. Leo and his friends were on the line when he noticed the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.

Adamma was in the company of her friends, Glory and Ekene, and she could not but notice Leo’s eyes all over her. She turned to Glory and said, “Why is this monkey staring? At this stage of our lives we are looking for husbands not monkeys.” Leo passed by the ladies and said hi, but they did not answer him.

A few days later, Leo and his friends saw Adamma at the cafeteria. Leo paid for her meal, but she did not acknowledge him or say thank you; she just walked away.

The following week, Leo saw her again on the road to the auditorium. He walked up to her and tried to create a conversation, but Adamma was neither rude nor polite.

The following day, a lecturer walked into the auditorium and announced the name of a top politician’s son. “Your attention is needed outside.”

That was how Adamma got to know Leo’s surname. As she saw him stand up and walk outside, her disposition changed. She told her friends that she was going to walk up to him after the lecture and talk to him. Glory and Ekene advised her to give it two days, so it would not be too obvious.

Soon, Leo and Adamma were dating. They were going strong and he was spoiling her with all kinds of gifts and things money could buy. They were the toast of the campus. Just a few months into their relationship, Leo proposed to Adamma with a lovely diamond ring which she showed off to anyone who cared to see.

One day, Adamma and Ekene got into a big quarrel and started exchanging words and trading insults. In the process, Ekene mentioned how Adamma used to call Leo “monkey” before she got to know whose son he was and started loving him. Nearly everyone in the hostel that day heard them quarrel, and in no time gist had reached Leo that Adamma used to call him “monkey” before she knew who his father was.

Adamma quickly rushed to explain to him that she did not know who he was at that time.

  • Leo is faced with the question, “Is it that she did not know who I was, or she did not know who my father was?
  • He does not know now if it’s true love. Will the love Adamma professes stand the test of time?
  • Leo does not understand how a “monkey” became the love of her life

Adamma has not done anything wrong as far as he can see in their relationship; she is the perfect girlfriend. Should he continue with their marriage plans?

If you were Leo, would you go ahead to marry Adamma?

Please advise him.