Let’s Define “Snatching”

Mary and Martha are members of the same church, and both of them serve in the choir. Mary has been dating Ugo for 5 years. Like many relationships, there were issues, and they had broken up and made up a few times.

Martha put out word that she was looking for a house as she wanted to change apartments. The information reached Mary and she told Martha there was a vacant apartment in her compound. Mary gave Martha the agent’s number, and soon Martha moved into the vacant apartment.

One day, Ugo went over to Mary’s house to drop off some of her belongings; they had just broken up again. As he was coming out of the house, he saw Martha stepping out. He’s had his eyes on Martha since the day he saw her in church, but she had always seemed unapproachable. Mary peeped out of her window and noticed that Ugo was going to give Martha a ride, so she ran out.

“Ugo, there’s something important I need to discuss with you, please come back inside.”

From that day, Mary started trying to befriend Martha, but Martha kept her distance. Ugo on the other hand had started frequenting Martha’s office and inviting her to lunch. Eventually she agreed, and while they were out eating, she asked about Mary.

“We’ve broken up. It’s over between us,” Ugo said.

It’s been weeks since Martha and Ugo started dating, and Ugo’s happiness knows no bounds.

Mary

Mary is very bitter. She’s going from one member of the choir to another, telling them how Martha snatched Ugo from her and did not even give time after their breakup before pouncing on him. She’s convinced that if Martha had not entered the picture, she and Ugo would have made up as they always do, and they would be together now.

Martha

Martha says Ugo did not tell her that the breakup was recent. He told her that the relationship had died a long time ago, and that Mary knew he was not going to marry her.

Ugo

Ugo says Mary is a manipulator, that their relationship wasn’t heading anywhere. When they broke up last year, she had called the whole church on him, crying to everybody. Church members were reaching out to him and pleading with him to reconsider, and even the pastor had to call him and ask him to make peace with her. That was when he went back and made peace with her. To her, they were back together, even though he kept telling her that they were just friends.

Mary says there are rules:

1. You don’t date your friend’s ex.
2. You should give a one-year period to allow for healing, before going into another relationship. She also feels Ugo should have known it’s too awkward ‎to date Martha after her, when they both live in the same apartment building and sing in the same choir.

What do you think? Who made the rules, and why is it that you can’t date the ex of someone you know?

Did Martha snatch Ugo? If she did or did not, how do we define snatching?